I’ve reached a certain weight that im very, very terrified of. A weight thats considered healthy. I’ve been having the urges to cut lately, and i dont want to give in. I’ve been obsessing over how i want to loose weight again. I dont feel good about myself, AT ALL. I’ve been purging more too. support please?
my name is Pippin, and I’ve been recovered from binge eating disorder for 2 years now. I used to do it, well, for the opposite reason, I wanted to gain weight, and I couldn’t. Now I need to remember when to eat, because my appetite’s messed up, but I’m so much happier that I don’t have the compulsive need to eat everything, next I gotta tackle my pica, but one step at a time. I can’t thank my friends enough for being here, I really can’t.
I just noticed that you reblogged one of my photos from my series of ‘Love Your Shape’ sticky notes. This blog is amazing! The whole Love Your Shape Post-It project was something my theatre troupe did on my university campus. People responded so positively! (except maybe the janitors)
Anyway, last year we put on a musical play about body image and eating disorders. Here is a preview for it (I’m the one with long, blonde hair):
I just want everyone to know that you are never alone in feeling pressure about the way you look and there is always help out there. Don’t give up and don’t give into what everyone says you “should” be. You are you, and you are beautiful!
Hi! Your blog is so inspirational and I love everything you are doing! Please do you think you could help me out and help me get the message of my blog out? I want to show people that society is messed up and that you dont have to look like barbie to be perfect or beautiful! :) Thank you! <3
im adding you guys on my lists of blogs to follow :D
You're Blog Is so Lovely in every way . I am a recovering anorexic, and i just wanted to say thank you for this. I've recently went back to starving myself again and exercising, but i just went on your' blog, and it makes me want to not slip up. i want to get better. Gracias<3
So I've been recovering from anorexia for 6 months. I went to my weekly outpatient apt today and while I was on my way out I saw a girl who was being admitted. For the last couple weeks I've wanted to relapse and now I want it even more. I have never been admitted. I was almost admitted but at the last minute they decided I would recover better at home. I'm now a healthy weight, I want to be sick again, I miss it. I feel like I've failed my ed...I need to please it. Help me please?!
dont let yourself feel triggered by others. this is your life. this is your recovery. think of how far you’ve come, why turn back now? theres so much more to live for outside of what ED has to offer. keep thinking of what you’ve gained through your recovery and what you’ve lost with your eating disorder.
Soccer wife, singer, fashion designer and mother Victoria Beckham finally admitted to having suffered from an eating disorder after repeated denials. Highly successful as a Spice Girl and married to England’s best soccer player, Victoria released her first book, ‘Learning to Fly’, in September, 2001, in which she tells the truth about her painstaking fight to look good.
In her book, she writes that she was “obsessed” with her body and with her appearance during the time when her career with the Spice Girls was at its peak. In the gym, instead of checking my posture or position, I was checking the size of my bottom, or to see if my double chin was getting any smaller,” the BBC quotes the actress as writing.
Victoria also claims that her image obsession began in the early days of the Spice Girls, founded in 1994, when management told all five members to slim down. Years of dieting ensued, a time during which, as Victoria, known as Posh Spice, claims, was fuelled by fellow band mate Geri Halliwell’s suggestion to take liquid food substitutes.
“I began living on vegetables and nothing else. But it never occurred to me that I had an eating disorder,” fametastic.co.uk quotes the star as saying. Later, Victoria reportedly succumbed to binge eating, with the BBC reporting her as saying she’s eat 10 bowls of cereal in one sitting
When asked about the size 0 obsession and eating disorders among models, she said: “All of the girls – I know quite a few models and they actually eat, they’re just naturally thin girls. And just because you’re thin it doesn’t mean you have an eating disorder. What is more of a concern is the age of the girls. Some of the girls on the catwalk are 13 years old and that is more worrying to me than the size of the girl, to be honest,” People magazine quotes her as saying.
-I am not afraid of growth enhancing commitments, which will advance my recovery.
-When I fill my body with good things I need-rest, proper nutrition, satisfying work, loving and caring, my effectiveness grows.
-Recovery may seem hard, but isn’t the alternative worse.
-Today, I will make an effort to take one small step toward reaching one of my goals.
-I can cope with change today without turning to or away from food.
-I can accept my difficulties as challenges, using them to spur on to continued growth.
-Today I will take every chance to participate in life, not control it.
-Today I will take a long good look at the good things in my life.
-I look back and see that my failures are showing me the way to success. I will accept the best I am able to do right now as success for today.
-I may not be in a very good mood. I may not make visible progress today. But, at the very least, I can avoid self-destructive behavior around food. I can follow my meal plan for today, whether I feel like it or not.
-My opinions are worthwhile and deserve to be heard.
-I am responsible for my own attitude.
-I choose to be kind and patient with myself in my progress toward recovery.
-I can be good to myself today and let my meal plan take care of my weight.
-Slips and slides should not be excuses for giving up.
-I give myself permission to begin again with whatever I am trying to learn.
-May I courageously continue the adventure of self-discovery.
-My Ed behaviors take me out of circulation and away form meaningful contacts. Recovery gives me back to those I love.
-I can decide to be cheerful and optimistic, just for today.
-I love and accept myself where I am now. I am wonderful.
-I am free to take charge of my life.
-I choose to release anger in harmless ways.
-I bless my body with love. All parts of my body are beautiful.
-I accept only thoughts that support me and make me feel good.
-I am the living, joyous expression of life. I am my own person.
-No person, place, thing, or thought has power over me.
-I am totally adequate for all situations that arise.
-I move forward with confidence and ease. I trust the flow and process of my life.
-I recognize my own true worth.
-It is safe for me to grow up. I can now handle my own life with joy and ease.
-I feel love for my body and the way it works.
-I am never STUCK. Change is always taking place.
-I am the only person who thinks in my mind. I am the power and authority in my world.
-I experience and express my emotions freely.
-I love and approve of myself, am at peace with my own feelings and stand tall and free.
-If I can endure for this minute whatever is happening to me. no matter how heavy my heart is or how dark the moment might be…If I can but keep on believing what I know in my heart to be true, That darkness will fade with morning and that this will pass away, too…Then nothing can ever disturb me or fill me with uncertain fear, For as sure as night brings dawning, my morning is bound to appear…
-I will hold on. I will be brave. I am almost there. I will never give up.
-I am naturally beautiful when I am myself.
-I am meant to be very different from everyone else. This releases the burden of feeling like I have to be someone other than me.
-I carry within me all the essentials of a happy existence.
-I will live my life in the way I want to be remembered.
-I will never please everyone and that’s okay.
-I am proud of myself for all I have accomplished no matter how small or great.
-I will not let the lessons or experiences of the past dampen my enthusiasm for new beginnings.
-One step at a time. That is how I will get where I am going.
-I can let go of shame.
-I am free to be all I can be.
-I can learn to embrace change.
-I will let myself receive the healing I need.
-I will not allow my disorder to control or manipulate me.
-I will nurture myself through each stage of recovery.
-I make the world more special just by being in it.
-I have choices. I can choose new responses to old situations. I can learn to recognize my true needs and choose positive ways of satisfying them. I can choose recovery-NOW!
-Whatever my weight today, I am a worthwhile person with valuable contributions to make to those around me.
-The only limitations I have are the ones I place on myself
If you stand in front of a mirror and obsess over every minor detail of your appearance, Ed will never truly let you be satisfied. He will make you pinch, stretch, measure, and weigh every one of your aspects, and heres the bad part, it will always be a bad critique.
Mirror, Mirror on the wall am I the fattest of them all? When you have Ed in your life, you live life like a ninja in a way; you run and twist just to avoid getting a glimpse of yourself in mirrors, windows, or anything else that casts a reflection of your body. But once you see the reflection, its as if Ed slaps on sticky notes all over with red writing that point out your every flaw. You must learn to stop fearing the mirrors, and you also must break the habit of using it to harm yourself when you stand in front of it obsessively checking for flaws.
The Scale- Eds favorite, biggest, and most used tool. Ed will do absolutely anything and everything in his power to make you feel bad, no matter what, about what number you see on the scale. It will NEVER be low enough. You might get down to your Goal Weight, but Ed will pat you on the back just to say, Great job, no lets see how much more we can lose. And then ten pounds later, hell still say you have too much of a pooch on your tummy or thunder thighs. You must learn to break free of the scale, it is only a number. You must believe that, and you must not let a number define who you are as a person, because when it really comes down to it, what matters about who you are, its not weight or BMI that matters.
Measuring Tape- Ed loves to make you obsess with the measuring tape, he likes to make you wrap it around your every body part, ensuring that nothings getting out of control. But just like the numbers on the scale, the numbers of the tape will never be good enough for Ed either. You must get rid of the tape as well, cut it up, throw it away, whatever. Just get rid of it. This number doesnt define you. Break free!
Small Clothes Size 6, size 4, size 2, size 0, size 00, size 00000000000000, size six feet underground. No size will ever be small enough for Ed; he will always want things smaller and smaller. If you are in recovery from an Eating Disorder, and know that you will need to gain back some health, and restore your weight, you need to let go of your Anorexic clothing. All of the skinny jeans in sizes that you know arent your true, natural, and healthy size, you must let them go. Because all they will do is torture you, they are evil, and they are Eds tools that he liked to decorate you with. You must not allow these clothes to have power over you, and the best way to do that is to get rid of them. Now if that means shredding them, giving them to Good Will, or plain throwing them in the trash can, it doesnt matter, just get rid of them!
Magazines, Television, & other people- Ed LOVES, absolutely LOVES to point out other people and if theyre smaller or bigger than you. Just walking through the store he might decide to torment you with the comparison game. He can turn your favorite movie or TV show into a competition of thinness. You have to understand that everyones weight is meant to be different; the world is FULL of differently shaped and proportioned people. You cant fit a square into a circular hole, and thats what its like when a girl whos meant to be a size 9 tries to be a size 4.
Food- Believe it or not Ed does love food. He loves to dangle in front of your face just to say that you cant have it. That or he likes to make you eat it plus lots more. Food is what he causes you to obsess over; he masks his true goal, which is to kill you, with food. Food is a natural human need, not a sin.
Calorie and Diet Manuals- These give Ed the power to teach you how to use his tool of food. He teaches you with these you can and cannot have. I suggest giving these to a book store or burning them.
Hey, I have a wall of inspirational quotes that I find really useful when it gets too hard - I wrote them up, there are loads, so if you like any of them it would be lovely to see them on the quotes page :)
Stop comparing yourself to others. You’re your own person.
I’m not telling you it’s going to be easy, I’m telling you it’s going to be worth it.
Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning to dance in the rain.
You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.
Determination will get you through this.
Fairytales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.
Destroy what destroys you
Hate is easy. Love takes courage.
Perhaps strength doesn’t reside in never having been broken, but in the courage required to grow strong in the broken places.
You are beautiful. And nobody has the right to make you feel like you’re not.
Forget what hurt you in the past. But never forget what it taught you.
It will all turn out fine in the end. If it’s not fine, it’s not the end.
When the world says ‘give up’, hope says ‘try one more time’.
Keep your face in the sunshine and you will never see the shadow.
Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow.
Sometimes it takes a good fall to really know where you stand.
Faith is taking the first step, even if you don’t see the whole staircase.
The past can hurt, but the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it.
The past is a good place to visit, but certainly not a good place to stay.
While we cannot direct the wind, we can adjust the sails.
You are always living the life you create. If it does not feel right, create something better.
Blue skies are coming.
If you’re brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a hello.
You are braver than you think you are and you will be free.
Maybe it’s not about trying to fix something that’s broken. Maybe it’s about starting over to create something new.
Every day might not be a good day but there is good in every day.
Everything is going to be alright. Maybe not today, but eventually.
Good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
If you want to fly, you have to give up the crap that weighs you down.
The minute you think of giving up, remember the reason why you held on for so long.
It doesn’t matter how long it takes, all that matters is getting there.
To believe a thing is impossible is to make it so.
Inner beauty never needs makeup.
Live life like the lion and be as brave as you can be.
We’re all in the gutters, but some of us are looking at the stars.
You can never cross the ocean unless you first lose sight of the shore.
You are loved. You are lovely and you are loved. End of story
Even if you fall on your face, you’re still moving forward.
The only thing harder than letting go is moving on.
There is no failure except in no longer trying.
No matter how long the winter, spring is sure to follow.
At any given moment you have the power to say, this is not how the story is going to end.
Once you realise your past is just a story, it has no power over you.
If you want to sing out, sing out.
There comes a time when you have to stop beating yourself up over the mistakes that you’ve made.
To anyone who told you you are not good enough, they are no better.
Sometimes you need to step outside, get some air, and remind yourself of who you are and where you want to be.
Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. But today is a gift. That’s why they call it a present.
Turn the page and leave the past behind.
Who knows where this path will take us, but let’s promise never to give up because it may lead us somewhere vast and amazing.
You are a victim of the rules you live by.
Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and think instead of what could go right.
Turn your wounds into wisdom.
Never forget you are worth more than the value you place on yourself.
You have to be brave with your life so others can be brave with theirs.
It takes more bravery to find out who you are beyond your pain than to merely survive it.
Elton John has gone public about his struggles with bulimia, as well as a less common eating disorder of chewing and spitting.
Elton John checked himself into rehab for cocaine addiction and bulimia in 1990, after what he says were 16 long years of denial. As a celebrity, it was hard for him to acknowledge that he could need help or that he had a problem he couldn’t fix on his own. “As soon as I said those words [“I need help”], I knew that I was going to get better, and I was determined to get better,” he told Larry King in 2002. “But it was just a relief to be able to say those.”
King asked Elton if getting help for his addictions was harder than coming out. “Yeah, absolutely,” Elton responded. “Because, you know, you think you know everything. And you think, you know, I can fix this. I can fix this. And of course, it got worse and worse and worse.”
When he finally found help, his treatment, Elton says, was successful. “I did what I was told… I went to lots of meetings, met new friends, did what my sponsor told me to do, kept in touch on a daily basis. I started to enjoy things I had never done before.”
Like Princess Diana, whom Elton says confided in him about her own bulimia, Elton inspired increased public conversation about eating disorders, particularly among men, who are often not associated with the syndrome.
In the sinfully “perfect” world of television and cinema, many actresses suffer from eating disorders. Jessica Alba is one of the first to put up her hand and admit she battled anorexia for years.
“Everyone in my family is heavily overweight and I wanted to be healthier, so I started cooking for myself when I was 12,“ she told The Sun.
The obsession with her body continued, particularly when she was preparing for ‘Dark Angel’, her huge breakout role. The ‘Fantastic Four’ actress was so obsessed with looking good for the role that she was working out for 3 hours every day and hardly eating.
Femalefirst.co.uk reports that Jessica’s weight dropped to 100 pounds, which is when she realized she had a problem. In an interview with Glamour Magazine in 2005, Jessica said: “A lot of girls have eating disorders, and I did too. I got obsessed with it. When I went from a girl’s body to a woman’s body with natural fat in places, I freaked out. It makes you feel weird, like you’re not ready for that body”.
Jessica, 28, has since made name for herself as one of the sexiest actresses in Hollywood, with a healthy body. Movies in which she was able to show off her toned physique include ‘Into The Blue’ and ‘Honey’ has also starred in other big-name productions, including ‘Sin City’ and ‘The Eye’.
Elisa Donovan is an actress who shot to fame playing the role of bitchy Amber opposite Alicia Silverstone in ‘Clueless’. Her career continued successfully when she landed the role of Morgan Cavanaugh in the hit TV show ‘Sabrina, The Teenage Witch’.
In an interview Elisa said she was a “hard core anorexic” between the years 1993 and 1995. Carinonline.com quotes the actress as saying: “At first, I’d eat no fat. Then, I’d just eat breakfast–cereal and toast–and not eat again until night.”
Elisa continued to lose weight over the years and became obsessed with the fear of putting on weight. At the height of her illness this 5ft 6in tall beauty weighed only 90lbs and was working full time. Eventually her weight reduced so much she suffered from a mild heart attack, wikipedia.org reported. This was a wakeup call for the red-haired beauty.
Elisa, now, travels the country and talks about her struggles to help others. She has also written a story for ‘Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul’, documenting her struggle. Now that her battle with anorexia is over, Elisa is healthy and working again. She has worked on many television series and movies after her battle with anorexia.
Self Soothing Skills: An Essential Tool of Eating Disorder Treatment and Recovery
Learning and practicing effective self soothing skills may be one of the most important aspects of an effective eating disorder treatment plan. Here are some suggestions to consider when developing personalized coping skills for a life of recovery and hope.
I. Mindfulness - Tune into the five senses and be in the moment. Feel the pressure of your body sitting on the chair, smell the scents in the room, listen to the birds outside, look at a beautiful picture on the wall, taste the vibrant flavors of a strawberry.
II. Distractions - Read good books, go to the movies, play sports, play board games, have some good ‘ole fun and leave the worrying for another day.
III. Bubble Baths - A candle lit bubble bath is one of the best comforts this life has to offer! Indulge! It is well deserved.
IV. Music - Play your favorite songs and CDs. Listen to the music closely. Experience the music. Observe how it feels.
V. Journal - Writing down thoughts and feelings is a cathartic opportunity to express churning emotions and think through situations. This also provides a window into new insights and revelations.
VI. Tea - Have a tea ceremony! Make a cup of tea or a hot chocolate. Put it in a favorite mug or adorable tea cup, heat the water in a kettle on the stove, breathe deeply and enjoy the process of making a cup of tea. Then, enjoy the treat.
VII. Exercise - Take a leisurely walk or a brisk run. This is an excellent way to use up some intense emotional energy or stress. Swimming, bicycling and yoga are also great forms of exercise that can impart a sense of well being and hence comfort.
VIII. Wear comfortable clothes - Put on the most cozy pair of sweats and fuzzy slippers, loose is good! Allow the body to feel the soft sensation of cotton or silk against the skin.
IX. Talk - Talk it out. Talk about the feelings, thoughts and observations with a trusted friend or therapist. It is comforting to feel understood, in and of itself. Additionally, the burdens may seem less draining when they are shared with another.
IX. Get into Nature - Spend some time gardening, observing the beauty of the trees that may line the street, seek out local parks and arboretums to enjoy the beauty of nature.
Learning to self soothe oneself can be difficult. Life is hectic, stressful and sometimes frantic; eating disorders are often developed, in part, to deal with these burdens. To help soothe and lessen these difficulties, implement this essential tool. It will be beneficial and rewarding when used as an integral part of an eating disorder recovery treatment plan.